Parents Of Daughter’s Girlfriend Are Not Supportive.

June 15, 2011
Female

Q: I have been a Chely Wright fan for years and I have actually met her here in the Netherlands when she came to perform for the troops. I was not surprised when she came out I support her 100% and bought her book Like Me my daughter who is 18 asked if she could read it and of course I let her I had seen some changes with her after she read it. She came out to me, which she knew I have always told her I would support her gay or straight it is not her that has an issue with who she is. Her girlfriend tried to come out to her parents and they basically told her she would rot in hell. I have been very supportive of their relationship. We live 3 hours away from her and I have taken my daughter to see her girlfriend about every 3 weeks. The girlfriend is having a very hard time of it she is afraid of losing my daughter because of her parents and I feel so helpless is there anything I can do? Again Thank You Chely for writing a very personal story.

A: Dear Great Mom,

The first thing you can do is give yourself a nice pat on the back for being a great parent. How wonderful you are to support your daughter in both her life style and her relationship.  She is a very lucky young girl.  As for her girlfriend, that is a very challenging situation.  Since I don’t know the ages of these girls, it is difficult to say what they are legally allowed to do on their own.  Depending on that, she may or may not be able to make some choices for herself.  If not, she may be forced to live by her parents rules.  You can continue to be loving and supportive of their relationship which is a wonderful thing. You could also try and help educate her parents about LGBT issues and sexual orientation.  It’s a very difficult and personal situation and many families feel that it is a private matter.  Ask your daughter’s girlfriend what she thinks would be helpful. She might have the best ideas.  You are a very kind and loving woman.  The world needs more mothers like you.  Thank you.